Rubber Ducky, You're the One

Stella's least favorite activity is taking a bath. Though, I've never actually known of a dog who liked a bath. What makes me laugh about Stella, though, is that she always seems to try to get into the bathtub when I'm taking a bath or shower. In fact, this past week I was having a very stressful time with work and school. I decided to treat myself to a wonderful, relaxing bubble bath. I lit candles, put on my favorite mellow music mix, and added lots of lavender bubble bath. The second I got in and settled, Stella came running into the bathroom. She went to jump into the tub, but luckily my reflexes were fast enough to block her entry. She didn't leave my side until after she burped in my face. Then she went to play with Gingerbread Man. However, when it's her turn, she won't go near it. The second she sees me take out her bottle of shampoo (which she really does know the difference between her shampoo and mine), she hides under my kitchen table.

Once I coax her into the bathtub, she tries to stay away from the faucet as much as she can. She shakes and shivers and tries to jump out of the tub. One time she even managed to jump out of the tub, run out of the bathroom, and prance right onto my bed. She then tried to make herself invisible by hiding behind my pillows and into my blankets. Needless to say that it created a few more chores for me to do that day.

Perhaps Stella's least favorite part of the bath is what happens after...the Evil Blow Dryer. Stella's nemesis is the Evil Blow Dryer. Actually, that's not entirely true. She has three real enemies, kind of like a puppy axis of evil. It consists of the Evil Blow Dryer, The Malevolent Blender, and the Spiteful Vacuum Cleaner. When I use the Evil Blow Dryer, she hides against the wall and tries to make herself into the smallest little ball ever. This creates a very funny result as odd patches of her become dry and the rest of her is soaking wet.

I take Stella to be professionally groomed every few months. Each time they predict that it will take 2-3 hours and the nice people at the pet groomers tell me they'll call me when she's ready. Every time it ends up taking more like 5-6 hours. Why? "Yeah, umm, she had a little incident with the blow dryer." They never elaborate, but I know from the tone of their voice that I better make sure I have enough cash on hand to leave a considerable tip.

Overall, I love giving Stella baths. If she knew that, I'm sure she would no longer be on speaking terms with me. I happen to think it's funny to see her fluffy self turn into a skinny, funny looking pup. AND, she's always so happy once it's over. Not to mention, she gets a lot more hugs from me. It's a lot easier to snuggle with a puppy who doesn't smell like poo.